Mistress the other day i followed Your direction and used a weight swinging into my balls to try to simulate Your foot connecting with them. As i told You in my email the pain was fantastic and so much after the first couple swings that it was difficult to remain still as i watched the weight's impending connection with my balls. While i know the quality of this movie is not very good i hope it amuses You.
Thank You so much for Your direction and wicked ways,
Mistress Denial has agreed to allow me to once again suffer for Her amusement. i can not express how happy i am that my long hiatus from serving Her has come to an end. At Mistress Denial's direction, today i found myself with my balls bound seperated about 2 inches apart and my cock tied pointing up. Not only did it feel great to have myself bound like this again but when i realized i was to remain this way all day i almost immediately began to drip. The day was a long one at work with my pants pressing against my bound balls all day. It felt amazing. Later in the day when i realized an email telling me to remain bound this way for another day i smiled and wondered why i had ever taken a break. Mistress i thank You so much for the suffering you are allowing me to experience and i look forward to seeing how much your wickedness has changed over the months.
It has been way too long since i last posted here and for that i apologize. Mistress Denial has had my balls aching so badly the past several days it has been wonderful. i had a day of "free reign" where i could do whatever i chose. In trying to make Mistress happy i chose to masturbate myself to the edge several times without reaching an orgasm. i think she was pleased but since then i have been paying the price without being allowed to reach an orgasm. i think perhaps next time i will let myself cum since i don't know how long it will be before i have that permission again. Yesterday i was ordered to wear my ball stretcher all day. This is a new stretcher i purchased and i don't think it is made for all day wear as it is fairly bulky and i think it is a little obvious. i continue to be in all day meetings with the same woman that i have been meeting with for the past 4.5 weeks and yesterday i made sure i was there first and sitting down. Whenever we took a break i let her leave first and then a few minutes later i followed her out so she would not notice the bulge. This worked i am sure. At lunch time with Mistress' permission i went to a "toy" store to purchase a less obtrusive ball stretcher and when i got there the store was not open. i have no idea why this is (probably the gods out to get me or something) so i was unable to make my purchase. i am heading back today to get the ball stretcher and also a cock cage Mistress wants me to get so that the next time i am made to wear a ball stretcher to work it is less obvious. It has been almost a week since i last came and even the simple act of typing the blog has my cock erect and dripping. i love the way Mistress makes me feel.
No excuses but i have been so busy at work i have not managed to post in a couple days but what a couple days it has been. Mistress began Her game of chance on two days ago and the first task was that i was allowed to cum but i had to consume my cum. i know for a submissive this should not have been the first time i ate my own cum but for me this was a first. It was so exciting to know i was doing this for Mistress. i made myself cum in a glass and then very slowly first tasted just a tiny bit of cum. It wasn't too bad really for me it was the texture that i didn't enjoy. After that initial taste i proceeded to drink the rest of my cum down quickly. i did not enjoy this except the fact that i knew i was doing something i didn't enjoy and i was doing it for Mistress. Yesterday in the game of chance the card drawn meant i had to hit my balls every 30 minutes. The game did not specify how many times i had to hit them each time so i decided to do it 10 times. Once i had set this mental number i committed myself to this. i probably should have chosen fewer hits. my balls are aching something fierce this morning it feels so good. i continue to work on a project at work which puts me in a meeting all day every day with the same woman. This adds to the excitement since she was aware of my getting up every 30 minutes and leaving the meeting. She probably thought i was not feeling well but suprisingly she never said anything. Towards the early afternoon walking normally was a bit difficult but i managed to get through the day without being obvious.
i am greatful for Mistress and Her mind and i continue to look forward to any tortures she bestows upon me.
Well yesterday was an amazing day. It all began with Mistress telling me to get a locking cock cage by the end of the month and to send Her the key. As i explained in my post yesterday this worried me because i love the feeling of being on the edge and having my cock dripping almost constantly. Mistress would hear none of this and She told me it would do me good to not be able to get a hard on for however long She decided. This is Her decision to make and not mine so i will comply and purchase the locking cock cage by the end of the month. i still can not fathom this but i will soon find out what it is like to not have any control of my cock.
Yesterday Mistress also allowed me to torture my cock and balls for Her. She devised this wicked game that had me in my ball stretcher with a candle in front of me. i had to take myself to the edge 10 times and each time when i reached the edge i had to wave the tip of my cock in the hot part of the candle flame. The first 2 were not too bad although the flame was certainly hot. By the 5th edge my balls were aching and the tip of my cock felt like it was on fire. It was so sensitive from the edges and from waving it through the flame. It took all my will power to actually submit the very sensitive tip of my cock to the flame towards the end.
Today i can still feel the tip is a bit sensitive and it is a wonderful reminder of Mistress. i hope She continues to torture me in any way that delights Her. It is like a drug that i want more and more of. i long to receive Her tasks and i long to see what tortures She may make me inflict on myself.
i am so nervous. Mistress Denial told me to go out and buy a locking cock cage this morning and to send her the key. She lives 3000 miles away so time between orgasms would be at a minimum a week since it would take that long to send the key back and forth. What distresses me the most is that i love teasing and denial so much that this would take the teasing part away from me. my cock would not be able to get hard in the cage. This has always been the part of chastity that i have not understood. i want to keep my cock free from being locked up so i can stroke it all the time (when i am not being punished) and bring it to the edge of orgasm many many times before finally being allowed to cum. i love to feel my cock get hard all on its own because i am so horny the smallest thing arouses me. i love feeling it leak precum into my pants worrying if the spot will show through my pants and be visible to others.
i am hoping that Mistress will choose to take the other route with me and instead of locking up my cock she will decide that if i am to keep it unlocked then she is going to torture and tease it mercilessly.